Men Should Read Erotic Romance

Normally I post random thoughts on Friday. But this Friday, my random though deserved a separate post. Men should read Erotica and Erotic Romance. They should do this for a number of reasons. Here’s a perfect illustration why.

*I used to be in a book club. It was a chick lit book club. But we had a dude in it. And he’s the one that turned me on to erotic romances. He told me he read them because his wife appreciated it.*

So guys, read erotic romances. Your women will appreciate it. Really they will.

First, read it because it’ll help you get into the mind of a woman. Now I’m not telling you to use lines from the things you read. But if your at a loss for what a woman wants in a particular situation, use the readings as guide posts. If your feeling at a loss because your brain is from Mars and her brain is from Venus, women writing men characters can give you a glimpse into the wants of how women might want you to respond. This isn’t rocket science dudes. And even if you don’t think any real life dudes would behave the way males behave in romances, still it’s like an outline for how she wants you to behave. Get as close as you can while still being authentic.

Second, read and reread the sex scenes. Seriously. Reading explicit erotic romance can make you a better lover. Trust me on this, you want to be a better lover. After many martinis and lots of heart-to-heart girl talks, LOTS of men need to do better. If you don’t think this is about you, it is. Your girl just won’t tell you. I will. Read some frickin’ books. Learn some new techniques. Figure this shit out cause YOU really need to. Really. I can’t stress this enough. Can’t. Stress. This. ENOUGH. This post is about you. Seriously.

If you’ve ever wondered what women want or the woman you are with can’t verbalize what she wants, read some frickin’ books and try out a variety of the things being written in those books. It’s a pretty sure bet, at some point, you are going to hit upon what your woman wants. If you’ve gotten into a rut or you don’t think your current technique is all that, don’t read dude publications to fix things. You want to read women’s writings, thought and wants. I mean it is women you are sleeping with. Who better to give you pointers on how to be a better lover than women? Ummm, no one.

Third, even if you’re not in a rut or your woman thinks you sex it up fine, it’ll still expand your mind. You’ll get ideas. And they are kind of fun to read. It’s not called mommy porn (a term I loathe but fits here) for nothing. Even though most dudes are visual, there’s only so much shitty porn on TV you can watch before you’ve seen just about everything. Reading erotica and erotic romance will help broaden your horizons and you can visualize as you read. It totally engages your imagination. See it’s a new avenue to get your stranger sex fix.

So there are a lot of reasons guys should read Erotic Romance and Erotica. For them and for their partners. Of the three reasons above, I find one of them to be the most relevant to me. But I hope I given some dudes some things to think about because all of the reasons are relevant to guys.

Cool Summer Drinks

Here are some delicious summer drink recipes. Some have more alcohol, some have less. They are all refreshing. I will share some more as the summer goes on. lol

Campari Spritz

I had this a lot when I took a month touring Italy. It is light and freshing. Plus, it’s low in alcohol but high in bubbles. A perfect combo, yeah?

1 part Campari
3 parts prosecco
1 part soda water

Put into a wine glass. You can garnish with oranges or ruby red grapefruit slices. Yumm.

 

White Wine Sangria

Most people have had red wine sangria. But for summertime, white wine sangria is the way to go, especially if you live in warmer areas. And that’s saying something cause I am a red wine drinker. Don’t get me wrong, I like red wine sangria just fine. But the white wine one is really, really refreshing.

 

 

Ingredients:

1 bottle of Riesling or Gewurztraminer
1 bottle Vihno Verde or Sauvignon Blanc
1 can pineapple/oj frozen concentrate (not the little ones but a big one or you can use two little ones)
juice of one orange plus slices
juice of one lemon plus slices
juice of one lime plus slices
2 oz brandy
4 oz Cointreau or Grand Marnier
1 liter ginger ale or club soda or italian lemonade

lots of summer fruits cut up- green apples, strawberries, pomegranate seeds, mixed berries, etc.

Put all of the liquid into a large container or punch bowl, add citrus slices and cut up fruit. Viola white wine sangria. Let it sit for a bit for better fruity flavor. If you are going to let it sit, leave out the fizzy part(ginger ale et. al) until right before serving.

 

Blackberry Vodka Fizz

I saw this recipe using bourbon. I’m not a big bourbon drinker. So I substituted Vodka. It was still pretty good.

4-5 blackberries
1-2 oz vodka or bourbon
ginger ale
club soda

Muddle the blackberries with a little ice. Add vodka then fill 3/4 way with ginger ale. Add club soda until glass is full.

 

Music Monday 5/27/13

Esthero is probably one of my all time favorite singers. Ever. Her Breath from Another CD is in my top 10 CDs of all time. I would take it with me anywhere. Her voice can be sultry or bright. And while she has good musicians playing with her. She can rock the songs A Capella and they would STILL ROCK. Here are a few songs I really like. Enjoy!

This first one is with the illustrious Cee-Lo Green

This one is from her Breath From Another album.

This is from her latest album Everything is Expensive.

 

Smutty Sunday 5/26/13

Okay smut readers extraordinaire. Here are some reading recommendations. In no particular order.

Eric Flint has a series about the Ring of Fire in which a group of people with in the zone- the ring of fire, are all thrown back in time. Lots of history to go along with the whole time travel concept. It is a brilliant read. Brillant.

Next month Nalini Singh is going to have her last Psy-Changeling book in her series come out. It is 11 books of goodness. And I am waiting with bated breath to read this last one. I have read all of the others and they are fab-u-lous. Seriously rocking good reads.

For all you 50 shades fans out there, Sylvia Day has written her Crossfire series and they are so good, so magnificent, I don’t let myself think about the fact that the series isn’t going to be finished for another year or so. If i think about it, I might cry.

I usually try to get in a nonfiction book. But this time, I am going to recommend a nonfiction topic. Go to your local bookstore, it is better if you can find a good used bookstore, and find books on something you want to learn about. I just bought a bunch of books on tea ceremonies. The ones I have are in regards to Japanese tea ceremonies. But I also plan to get books about English tea ceremonies as well. And recipe books that go along with this subject. It behooves us all to keep learning new things. Trying new things out. Stepping outside out comfort zone and opening our minds. Pick something, flower arranging, watercolor, etc. Get some how to books, or books about its history or something like that. It’s kinda fun.

Random Thoughts Part 5

Haven’t had any random thoughts for a while. Been too busy. But I had some today.

Why do cable people make you wait all day for them to show up? Why can’t they just tell you it will be at such and such time? Or about such and such time so you can get other shit done? I think it is a power play. I know some people will say it is because they don’t know when one job is finished and they can’t get to the next job until the one before it is done. But seriously? I just don’t get… they will be there sometime tomorrow. Really? If I didn’t need my router so badly, I would be all like… maybe I will be home sometime  tomorrow. Arghhhh!

Every time we have a tragedy, everyone puts that they’re praying for the victims of the tragedy. Seriously? Did you not get the joke about the lottery ticket and the woman with kids who are starving and about to be kicked out their house? She just kept praying. Finally god told her she needed to help him help her and get off her ass and buy a lottery ticket or something so he’d have something to work with. Same goes here. Jaysus. Praying is all good and well for the non victims. But you know what they need more than prayer? Donations. Of money, of supplies, etc. Praying make the non victim PRAYOR feel good but doesn’t do bumpkiss for the victims. So donate and then pray. Or pray and then donate. Or just donate. Make the donation your prayer. Sheesh. Do I have to spell it out already?

I don’t understand the whole fanfic thing. Why write something not original? Why not read something original? Is it because you are jonesing before the next book the series is out? Or the series is over and you didn’t get enough? Seriously, don’t get it. Daydream about your favs like the rest of us. Don’t be all ripping it off. And if you do, don’t be looking to make a buck off it. The idea isn’t yours. Do all that hard work, turn over all the $$ to the original creator/author/licensee or come up with your own original idea. It’s as simple as that. If that were the rule, we wouldn’t be having Amazon Worlds and the like. I am just blown away. We obviously need one of Bill Maher’s new rules here.

Pesto baby

This is a basic pesto recipe. I had some fresh pesto in the Cinque Terre a few years back. It rocked. In fact, I loved it so much I have been dreaming of the day I can go back for a visit, or in my dreams, to live.

Since that time, I have been making pesto in the spring and summer. Instead of just using it on pasta, although it is good for that, try it on grilled chicken and lamb chops. That’s right- lamb chops, or better yet, a full rack of frenched lamb ribs. It is delicious.

And while the recipe below is THE basic basil pesto recipe, pesto is only limited by your palate and taste imagination.

Pesto

1/4c toasted pine nuts- I buy a huge Costco bag and stick it in the freezer to keep the oil from going rancid. Take a little out at a time and toast it. I put left over toasted pine nuts back in the freezer.
1-2 cloves garlic
a huge bunch of basil
olive oil
1/4c parmesan cheese- I prefer grated for this but shredded is okay
salt pepper

Stick all the ingredients except oil and cheese in the food processor. Whirl. Slowly add oil as the machine goes. Add enough oil that it is slightly runny. Stop machine. Add parmesan. Pulse. Don’t overheat the cheese. Pulse until incorporated. It should be thick but not paste like. More like not so thick pancake batter. If that makes sense.

Taste. Add salt and pepper to taste. Do this last because parmesan is usually salty. If you add salt beforehand, it might get too salty.

** good herbal substitutes: cilantro and parsley- also good on chops. Spinach & sub out pine nuts for toasted walnuts- good on chicken and as a spread for dipping. Some people like sundried tomatoes as a pesto. See how the combos are only limited by your imagination? It’s true.

Music Monday 5/20/13

A few albums helped get me through law school. P.M. Dawn cut the Bliss album during that time period. I used to listen to the CD over and over again. So much so I had to buy a second CD because I messed up the first one listening to it so much. So many good memories. So here are a few P.M. Dawn songs from that album. Enjoy

Cool Places on the Interwebz

When I first wake up on a Saturday morning, I have the house to myself. It is bliss. Quiet, peaceful and devoid of distractions. It’s almost like a scene out of a movie. You know, where the film makers pan to the breaking dawn, glorious waves or something else that symbolizes how wonderful a quiet, beautiful day can start.

Then, the rest of my household awakens and chaos reigns for the rest of the day. Taking my zen with it.

So, instead of trying to get words on a page, I cruise the internet. I have some go to sites.

Steep and Cheap and Woot are the first places I look. Hey, I like to shop and I like bargains. What can I say?

Then I check out writer websites. First up is the Grinder to check dates on the manuscripts I’ve submitted. Savvy Author is next to see if there are any interesting announcements, upcoming pitch contests and seminars that sound good. I keep a window to Absolute Write Water Cooler open pretty much all day. It’s an awesome community of peeps who write, edit and publish.

I also have other areas of the internet that interest me. Like Mark’s Daily Apple. It’s a primal living site and Mark talks about all things primal. From clothes to food to exercises. It’s cool and informative. Another gem, a jewel really, is Dr. Davis’s website and blog called Track your Plaque. If you or someone you love is serious about heart health, or needs more information on how to reverse, or at least stop the progression of heart disease, Dr. Davis’s blog is a must see. MUST. SEE.

At some in the future, I will list more blogs, sites and interesting places to visit on the interwebz. But for now, this is it. Enjoy.

Shut the Fuck Up

So I was on twitter the other day, yeah, I was on twitter. So sue me. And a published author is ragging on self-pubbed authors that can’t afford to get professional editing before self-pubbing. The thought was that the self-pubbed author shouldn’t publish if she can’t afford an editor. To which I say, Shut the Fuck Up. You bigoted bigotty bitch.

See, not everyone has an agent. And not everyone has a publisher. And not everyone has money. But those very same people have good story ideas. Which do I want more? A good story with some shitty editing or a shitty story pumped out by flashy editors and publishers? Take a wild guess. Good stories win every goddamn time. Can’t tell you how many books suck big fat donkey dicks coming out of the Big 5 publishing houses all polished up and pretty. No amount of spit shine can put a good spin on a shitty story. A old boring-assed safe story.

Don’t think that I think all stories coming from the Big 5 are shitty. They are not. But neither are all stories coming from self-pubbed authors all shitty. They don’t have the money or the connections to get their first stories edited. Maybe if they make something on their self-pubbed work, they’ll be able to afford an editor. My fingers are crossed. Cause some of the worst edited works I have read in the last year come from self-pubbed authors with good stories and shitty connections. And some of the shittiest stories I have read in the last year come from well-connected highly edited authors with money.

But the elitest asshole, who said the shitty edited self-pubbed authors should take their stories and go home, needs to sit down and shut the fuck up. We don’t tell bands not to cut shitty demo records cause they can’t afford better equipment or a decent recording studio. We make allowances for them. We don’t tell artists they should work in expensive mediums cause otherwise their art isn’t good enough. We make allowances for them. Why is it so hard to understand that a writer, just starting out, self-pubbing their work, might not be able to afford all the bells and whistles that a more connected writer can? Where is the allowance for them?

So that’s my rant. It’s hard enough to put yourself and your work out there for public consumption. But when we get assholes who talk about you to your face or behind your back, well, something is not right in Whoville, yeah? And it makes it hard for an insecure artist, musician, writer to want to put themselves out there. Our world is poorer place for it. Way poorer.

Music Monday 5/13/13

Gonna rock out this week. I’m writing about drivers, rock stars and kick ass women. Need some tunes that get me in that groove. A little Incubus, Linkin Park and Foo Fighters should fit the bill. These are some of my favs. Incubus and the Foo Fighters each get one song. Linkin Park gets two. One is by themselves. One is with some rappers. I love when genres mix it up. I could add a whole bunch from Linkin Park but gotta keep the post from getting too big. lol

Enjoy.