Some Days I Suck as a Writer

I reread what I’ve written and the fear that I suck overwhelms me. I think it’s natural. Sometimes, I just think maybe I should throw the towel in and quite while I’m ahead. Other days, I feel like I have stories that people want to read but my mechanics are atrocious and I should just stop already.

I’m not sure if all writers are plagued with doubt. I think so. But I don’t know for sure. There might be a writer out there that thinks all their words are gold and they shit roses. I dunno. Most days, I feel okay about my writing. Most days, I feel like even though my mechanics suck, I have enough talent to at least tell a decent tale. But every once in a while, I get a day that makes me want to cry, scream and nash my teeth. Because on those days, I just KNOW I suck as a writer.

But I seem to be a hard headed bitch. I plow through ANYWAY. I used to have periodic bouts of uncertainty in my before life as well. It diminished over time. But it still caught me. I mean, throwing up before every opening statement after a decade and a half was a pretty sure sign of some anxiety, no? I don’t have opening statements anymore. So my insecurity comes out in other ways. It comes out in me reading what I wrote and wanting to delete the whole frickin’ mess. But I don’t.

I got into a car accident when I was 16. I was pissed, scared and hyped. When it came time to go to sleep, I couldn’t sleep. The accident kept playing over and over in my mind. I went to my dad. He told me to stop thinking about it. Everyone walked away unscathed from the accident so no permanent damage had been done. Well, except to the cars but they could be fixed. But then he gave me a bit of advice that I use in lots of areas in my life. He told me to go to sleep and that everything looked better after a night of rest. That morning brought new perspective. So I shut down my mind and went to sleep. And when I woke up the next day, I did feel better. Not that it undid the accident, but that the accident wasn’t looming so large in my mind. I was able to get a handle on things. And he was right, not that everything looked rosy, but it didn’t look as bleak as it did the night before.

So when I am the most sure I suck as a writer, I shut down Word and putter around until I can get to sleep. Cause I know when I wake up, even if my writing stills sucks, I can find a new perspective and it wouldn’t look so bleak. Sleeping on it doesn’t make me any less of a sucky writer. What is does is allow me to make that suckiness not loom so large in my mind. I get a handle on it. Mostly. Well, until the next time I’m sure I’m a sucky writer.

Snippet- Open Road

Here’s a little snippet from Open Road to be released next month in the Hot Rods/Hot Bods anthology from Jupiter Gardens Press. Motorcycles, Motorcycle Riders and Menage. Oh my. And now for the disclaimer. The book hasn’t finished it copy edits or final approval. So some of the words might still be changed. Until it comes out in publication, nothing is set in stone. Words can change, things can get shifted around. Here ends the disclaimer. Enjoy.

She kept walking. Anytime someone got too close, she used her zapper. A few times she had to duck and weave. As she did, she brushed up against Deke and Zack’s back. If the situation hadn’t been so serious, she would have continued to rub up against them. As it was, the situation made it impossible to have more than brief touches.

While Deke and Nathan seemed to be able to push and shove bodies out of their way, she was leaving dropped bodies in her wake.

Here is the back blurb for Open Road.

Zoe Akio is a professional dirt bike racer who decides to ride her motorcycle across the country and think about a future post motocross racing. Her manager hires two bodyguards, Deke and Nathan, to travel with her. The three weeks with the three of them in close quarters changes all of their lives as a new, unexpected road opens up.

Plagiarism

So there was a big brouhaha this past weekend when Lorelei James found out that @AlisonGilmore had ripped off her entire book and put it up as her fanfic and then to a blog. AlisonGilmore claimed she was writing the book chapter by chapter. She wasn’t. She was and is a thief of the highest order. She ripped off someone else’s work and claimed it as her own. There was a huge internet smack down. HUGE. Like by several people all getting into the act and it brought her blog pages down and she ended up shutting off her twitter account. She now has a new twitter account and has made it private. Only the internet isn’t “private.” Not at all. The internet is very public and is forever.

Limecello posted a blog about the internet takedown.  As did Rilzy on her blog. They both have several pictures of the images capturing the twitter logs and the blog and the subsequent takedown. They have a, forever on the internet for all time and for anyone to see and read,  blog entry about the blatant plagiarism AlisonGilmore engaged in when she ripped off Lorelei’s book. The book was ALL JACKED UP.

Plagiarist aren’t new. They are the necessary evil when you are an award winning author. Only the internet makes it so much easier to find them and ferret them out. Like ridiculously easy. Almost as easy as it makes for someone to do the ripping off. So the internet is both a sword and a shield. It cuts and protects all at the same time.

What it can’t do is make stupid people smarter. Or people who can’t write, write. And that’s what it boils down to. Plagiarist are inherently lazy, stupid and weak. No talent is involved when you steal someone’s ideas and storylines. Word for frickin’ word.

AlisonGilmore sent a tweet that said in effect- writing romance, erotic romance and erotica is for talentless dweebs. I won’t go into why writing GOOD smex is hard- almost as hard as writing comedy. But what I will go into is my response to AlisonGilmore’s talentless dweeb comments. My tweet is below. I bolded what I wrote in response to her tweet. What I wrote is true. And it was a kick-ass response to her assertions.

 

D.R. Slaten ‏@DRSlaten 14 Jun

Plagiarism is for people who can’t think. @laurahunsaker @megantgrimm @loreleijames smut is for people who can’t write.

Smutty Sunday 6/16/13

Mine To Take by Cynthia Eden

 

Another smutty Sunday book rec deviation. Gonna focus on one author and one book. Cause that’s just what’s happening. One of these days we’ll return to my regularly scheduled program of doing a variety of different genre recs. But that day is not today .

Cynthia Eden. Need I say more? Hot alpha heroes. Wicked cool heroines. Lots of paranormal peeps. And Smoking sex.  Seriously, a girl who likes to read smut couldn’t ask for more. Not at all.

But here, I’m going to review her new contemporary romantic suspense novella- Mine to Take. Got an advance copy from NetGalley. It’s a longer novella. It is a really good length. I want to say it is a perfect length. But seriously, I love her writing so much that even a full length novel makes me want more. Never fails. I get to the end and I get the sads.

Mine to Take has a lot of goodness. I didn’t like the hero at first. I thought Trace was a douche of the highest order. But… but… but… as the story unfolded, I totally fell in LOVE with him. He has all the traits in an alpha hero that I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE. He’s a badass. He cares more for the heroine than himself. And when danger loomed large, Trace loomed LARGER.

Skye is being stalked. Her life is being threatened. And it is someone close to her. Someone who knows where she is and what she is doing. So she goes to Trace to ask for help in stopping her stalker. What she doesn’t know is that Trace has always looked out for her from the very first time they met in foster care. And that hasn’t changed. Won’t ever change. Can’t change. Because some people aren’t just people you meet and move on from. Some people get under your skin. And they become your very reason for breathing.

There are some twist and turns in this story. Both Skye and Trace have their trust, beliefs and sanity questioned. And the bad guy? Totally didn’t see it coming until the end. Which is the way a good suspense story should be.

Ten years they been apart. Cause if you love someone, really love someone, sometimes you have to do the thing you don’t want to do the most. Let them go. And it’s the hope, the undying, never-ending, all-consuming hope of them returning to you that drives you forward. Because if someone you love has a dream, and you are in the way of that dream and you love them more than you love yourself, there’s only one course of action. At least if your a badass alpha hero who has loved his woman since he was a kid.

And when she returns to you? Sheesh, not even a crazy-assed stalker is going to get in the way of THAT reunion and happily ever after. No way. No how.

So get Mine to Take on Amazon. Read it. Love it. I promise, you’ll like it. I did.

Random Thoughts Part 6

Why is it when you have guests in your home, your home doesn’t feel like your home anymore? It feels like you are the one on vacation and you’re in a strange location. Don’t get me wrong, I like having guests. It brings out the whole hostess in me thing. But the invasion of my home feels odd. It really feels like I am in another location if the people in my house are staying longer than an evening. Weird, right? Even weirder is that I WANT them to come and visit. But then I want them to LEAVE. It is a serious issue. A condition for which I have no cure. Damn it. I am a walking contradiction. lol

I don’t like the whole hurry up and wait thing we have going on in various parts of our lives. We speed on the roads only to have to come to an abrupt stop for traffic or lights or something. We hurry up to get to an arena for viewing- concerts, lectures, shows, etc., only to have to wait until it comes on. And then it is usually late. But we hurried to get there. Hurried to get seats. And in some cases, hurried to buy the damn tickets in the first place. We hurry to doctor’s appointments, dentist’s appointments, hair appointments, only to have to wait. Some of it is on us. We want to be first, on time, whatever. But some of it is just shitty traffic engineering. Bad light timing. Or shitty venue timing. Or just plain shitty doctors, dentists, hairdressers, etc. And don’t get me started on the hurry up and wait that goes on in airports when- god forbid, you have to fly somewhere. Jaysus.

When did it become okay to be misogynistic tools? Has the anonymity of the internet made the haters hate harder? I don’t think so. It as just allowed the cowardly bastard to express their hate using a wall to hide behind. Cowardly fucktards. Dude, if you are so sure of what you’re saying, so proud of who you are- BE YOU. Without hiding. Without shame. Without the sad stupid ass barrier of anonymity that internet use affords you. Because it also affords you the CHOICE of being all in by being ALL THE WAY OUT. Anything less is the pussification of your views and viewpoints. Stop being juvenile. If you can’t say it with your identity known by all and asundry, then you don’t have worthwhile viewpoints. At ALL. And just so we are clear, even if you do come out in the open with your vitriolic hate messages- against women, minorities, the moon in retrograde, it doesn’t mean you are any less of a fucktard. It just means you aren’t a hide behind the anonymity of the internet kinda of fucktard. Unfortunately, for you, your fucktardness isn’t something you change. Like losing weight, getting hair plugs, going under the knife to change your visage. No, your fucktardness is way past skin deep all the way into the marrow of your bones. For you, you will languish in the land of fucktardary until you draw your last breath. Yes, you asshat who belongs to the sfwa… this message is specifically about you and generally about all asshats.

Stop using your social media to turn yourself into spammers. You could be interesting. You could have sparking conversation, witty dialogue and kick ass discourse. I will never know because I unfollowed your ass, blocked your access and created a spam filter just for you. Cause that shit is just annoying. Seriously. STOP THAT SHIT. A shout out occasionally to promo your shit is cool. I get that. I do that. But if every tweet, every FB comment, every email is about your product- no matter what that product is, then you ARE A SPAMMER. A hated, reviled member of our electronic interaction community. You have just made yourself the red-headed stepchild.

That is all.

 

Spicy Chicken Corn Chowder

It’s been a crappy Spring and Summer. Where is the warmth? Not outside. Not really. But there’s some heat in the chowder recipe below. You can enjoy a big bowl of this and think that you’re warm. lol

Spicy Chicken Corn Chowder

2 slices bacon, sliced in 1-inch strips
1 medium yellow onion, diced
1 jalapeno, seeded and diced
1-2 russet or yukon jack potato, diced
1 small red pepper, diced
3 cups frozen corn kernels, thawed or 2 cans corn, drained
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 tablespoon chopped fresh thyme leaves
1-2 bay leaves
2 cups milk, cream or half & half
3 cups chicken broth
2 cups shredded rotisserie cooked chicken

 

Directions

In a large saucepot over medium heat cook bacon until crispy and all fat has rendered out. Remove with a slotted spoon to a paper towel lined plate. Drain off all but 1 tablespoon fat, add onion, jalapeno, potato, red pepper, corn, salt and pepper and saute for about 5 minutes. Add thyme.

Add chicken broth and bay leaves and let simmer for about  30-45 minutes until potatoes are tender.  Remove bay leaves.

In a blender, puree half the mixture and add back to the pan. Add milk, cream or half & half, and chicken. Simmer for 5 minutes or until liquid is warmed through but not boiling. Adjust salt and pepper.

Transfer to serving bowls. Garnish each bowl with cooked bacon.

 

Music Monday 6/10/13

Eclectic. Different. Tunes for the week. It’s more about the song, Rolling in the Deep, than it is about the artists. Enjoy.

The first is Linkin Park singing Rolling in the Deep LIVE. It’s an awesome cover. OMG.

And now here is Adele’s original version.

And finally, here is a piano/cello instrumental version. Awesome. Seriously.

 

Editing 101

I normally don’t write a whole lot about my writing process. While I think writing is endlessly fascinating, I don’t think non-writers think that at all. Not a lot of action happens when I write, well other than typing my ideas into the computer. lol So I try to make this blog about more interesting things. Things that interest me. But every once in a while, I like to share what I’m writing as well as how  I write. Today is a process piece. It’s all about editing.

This is not an advance class on editing. It is my technique for editing. I do one big edit and then I am done. I use a combo of Holly Lisle and Rachel Aaron‘s technique. Do what works for you. Like both of them, however, I do believe there is such a thing as over editing and diminishing returns on additional edits.

I print out my manuscript. That’s right. I don’t do a computer edit, not at first. The print out lets me switch from writer to editor mode in my brain. I become the teacher with a red pen. Then, I let it sit for at least 24 hours. Other people let it sit for weeks, months, etc. I can’t do that. I have a driving need to finish what I start. And having a polished, edited manuscript is the end of writing that book. For me at least.

1. Read the entire document through. Either underline or put check marks by misspelled words. Every time you see a time- day, hour, month, etc.,  reference write it down in a separate notebook making a timeline. On another sheet, write down plot holes, things that didn’t explained, characters introduced but not developed, etc. Big huge glaring things. Add a note of the page number.

2. Now read through again. Start scene analysis. Do this scene by scene. I write primarily romances. So I ask the question: Does this scene further the romance? Does it develop either character? Does the scene further the conflict by my heroine/hero? If not, mark it out. Fix timelime issues. You will be able to see them from the timeline you made. Fill in plot holes, explain the unexplained, remove undeveloped characters or add stuff to develop them. Remove extraneous words. Is the scene a mini-story? Could better words be used? Your pages on paper should look like it is bleeding red. lol

3. Start on page one and start making your corrections into the computer version of your document. If you found some stuff as you correct, if it is little things… fix as you go. If not, write it down. Make all your corrections from the earlier notes. Fix time and place issues.

4. Do another read through. Write down any errors you see and add it to your list. When you are done, go back and fix all the things wrong on your list by page. Do not start at the beginning again. Just fix your list mistake by mistake.

5. Do a final spellcheck. I usually do a concurrent grammar check as well. But this is fiction so there are a lot of exceptions. Many of you will and can skip adding in the grammar checker.

6. Now, let it sit for 24 hours. Either load your document onto a kindle or make a pdf file. Read it through from beginning to end like a reader. Use your reader brain. Does it work? Do your words flow? Is it a good story? Make logical sense?

7. Fix any errors caught on the read through like a reader reads. lol Do a final spellcheck.

8. Put the frickin thing away as you send it out into the big, wide world. 🙂

Viola, you are finished. And that is how I edit.

It used to take me two weeks to edit a manuscript of 20-30K words because I didn’t plot out my stories. Then I started using a vague basic outline and my editing time diminished.  Now, I write using a detailed outline and my editing time is cut almost by half to two-thirds. Why? Because I normally don’t have huge plot gaps anymore, or timeline issues- they got resolved in my outline already. Sometimes my characters do something I didn’t outline, so I just put it into my outline, work out further problems later in my outline that occur as a result and viola, back to using my outline for my story. I just started doing this for my last manuscript. The difference is AMAZING.

An outline also helps in writing a synopsis. I already have the bones to the synopsis in the outline. Easy peasy.  I will never write without a detailed outline again. Not only does it help with my writing, it is invaluable at the end when I am editing. Cuts my work time in half.

Start another manuscript while your finished manuscript is marinating. Then you can either edit straight through or write half the time/edit half the time. The choice is yours.

Mawr Cool Places on the Interwebz

Okay. I like the internet. It has made my life infinitely easier. Not better. Just easier. So here are some more places for you to visit when you’re on your computer and need to waste a little time or just want to find some cool crap.

Ill Will Press has some of the funniest videos that are so wrong on so many levels, you can’t help but enjoy it. Some of them will make you just laugh out loud, for realz. 🙂

Touch the Sky has tree camping. That’s right, you read it here… TREE CAMPING. I didn’t even know this existed. Now I can’t wait to do it. I found them through a magazine article. Then I looked it up and there are several outfits that do this. How cool is that?!?! I bet there’s even one in your area.

Rusty Moore is a fitness trainer in Seattle. He helps a lot of people look fit but not like steriod pumped people. He has a program specifically for women, who don’t want to look like a mini Arnold Schwarzenegger. Its his Visual Impact for Women. Click the link, listen to his video and decide if the price is right. I think it is.

Now for a writer page or two. 🙂 These are the pages I use when I am editing. Or in other words, ripping apart my manuscript so that I can put it all back together again better than before. Many people use Holly Lisle’s One Pass Manuscript Revision. I also like Rachel Aaron’s Editing for People who hate Editing. I use a combo of both. I took what I liked from each of them and used them together. And in life, as in most things like writing, that’s the way it should be. Take what you need, leave the rest.

June Blog Chain

Doing AW‘s June Blog Chain again. Might the last for a bit. I got a lot on my plate right now.

This month’s prompt:
Bugs

Yep. Bugs. Simple and easy. Prose, poetry, play. Fiction, nonfiction. It’s all good, all bugs.

Instructions:
Simply post your blog’s URL in this thread to join. I’ll let you know in this thread when it’s your turn. Once your turn comes up, you have two days to complete a blog post using the prompt. When you are finished, please add a link to your post on the thread.

Each post should be less than 1000 words if possible.

Bugs

“Don’t let them escape,” she cried.

“I’m tryin’ not to,” he answered.

“Oh my god. Get them.” She was horrified.

Silas wasn’t a very forgiving overseer. Not even a drop of compassion flowed through his veins. She and Orrin would be written up and their pay docked. The last thing she could afford was to have her pay docked.

“Hurry and get ‘em back into their containment units, Chessie,” Orrin’s tone was forceful while his voice was low. “Mebbe they won’t notice. Or mebbe we can tell ‘um they died in the unit.”

“That won’t work Orrin. They added the unit weight monitors yesterday. The units just got calibrated,” her voice held the resignation she felt. “It’s useless. I’ll file the report.”

“Shit.”

It wasn’t a minute after she hit send on the report, the communicator on the console started beeping. She didn’t want to hit the green button, but she did.

“Ms. de Marco?” asked Silas.

“Yes, this is she,” she answered, albeit reluctantly.

“I see from the report, your team lost a little under a gross of cockroaches,” he said. His voice held neither disapproval or approval.

“Yes sir. That’s correct,” she said. “It was my fault, sir. Mr. Abernathy bears no fault.”

“I noted that on the report as well,” he stated.

“It’s the truth,” she said emphatically. “Although Orrin helped me when I tried to get them back. They ran, sir. We couldn’t catch them.”

“The loss of the gross will cost the company just under $10,000 dollars, Ms. de Marco. How do you propose to rectify this situation?” Silas asked her.

“Well, I’ve given it some thought, sir. I would be willing to be docked half pay and work over time for the remaining portion,” she suggested.

“Acceptable,” Silas told her. Again, no inflection in his voice to indicate emotions running one way or another. “Computer please note the date and time of the agreement.”

“Agreement noted and entered,” a chipper female voice acknowledged.

“Will that be all sir?” she asked miserably.

“Yes. Good day,” Silas sign off. The communicator beeping one long beep to indicate the call was over.

“Crap,” she cursed.

“Doan worry, Chessie. I kin share my rations. I know you need ‘em,” Orrin offered.

“This can’t go on Orrin. We need to figure out a way to get the overflow when we open the units,” she said.

“How kin we do that if the company hasn’t?” Orrin asked.

“The company doesn’t care Orrin,” she said. “They dock the workers pay if any of those bugs get out. So they don’t have a profit loss. No profit loss equals no motive to fix the situation.”

“I guess that’s true,” Orrin agreed.

“Well we might as well eat lunch while we think about it,” she told him.

“Alright,” he agreed readily.

Orrin hit a series of buttons. Two bowls appeared with grayish extruded paste in them. He handed one to her and kept the other for himself.

“Hot sauce?” he offered her the bottle.

She took it. While the paste was nutritious, it tasted bad.

“Thanks. I can’t stand the taste plain,” she told him. “Since I started working here. Seeing how they live, I have to put something on it.”

“I just like the hot sauce,” Orrin grinned at her. “Even if the paste didn’t taste like shit, I’d put some on there.”

She didn’t say anything in response. There wasn’t really anything to say. So they finished their meal in silence. Each lost in their own worlds. She was pretty sure they were two vastly different worlds, but still, Orrin had his moments.

He wasn’t the brightest bulb in the box, but he was funny and nice. He was real nice. He’d helped her out on more than one occasion.

“Do you think we’ll ever get anything else to eat?” she wondered out loud. “I read about all the food that didn’t survive and I can’t imagine what they’d taste like.”

“I dunno, Chessie. Mebbe someday, the ground will grow things again. Or they’ll find somethin’ sides us and the bugs survived,” he said. “Until then, at least we kin eat all we want. Working with the food gots some benefits.”

“Yeah, at least my kid won’t starve,” she said sadly. “He just won’t have much besides food for a while.”

“Naw, girl. I told you I’d help out. And I will,” he said good naturedly.

“I can’t let you do that Orrin. You’ve been helping me out too much,” she said. “Who knew taking care of the food was so difficult?”

“They’re just particular. They don’t want ‘em to get out in case some other folks start to breed ‘em too. Then if everybody could grow ‘em and breed ‘em, the company’s profits would go down,” he said in a surprising moment of insight.

“Yeah. That makes sense,” she said. “It was just easier when I work part time in the office before Eric died, you know?”

“Yeah. I do,” he patted her shoulder. “Welp, it’s time to water the little buggers. Got to keep ‘em plump so they weigh more for sale.”

“Better than feeding them,” she shivered. She hated feeding them. Hated dealing with the corpses. The cyclical nature of the how they bugs ate human corpses, getting fat and then the bugs were ground into paste to feed living humans. Well, it just kind of freaked her out. If she’d never worked in this department, she wouldn’t have it in her face. She could have pretended. But when you’re the one feeding the damn things, it was real hard to pretend.

“Now ain’t that the truth.”

“You’re right. Let’s get back to work,” she sighed. “But one of these days, I am going to figure out how to get them from one unit to another without losing any of them.”

“That’d be a good thing, Chessie. Help us both out,” Orrin grinned at her.

Micro-farming cockroaches was essential now they were the only source of protein left on Earth. Well other than humans. But no one wanted to go there. At least not yet.

Participants and posts:
orion_mk3 – http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com (link to post)
Diem_Allen – http://mindovermistakes.blogspot.com (link to post)
Ralph Pines – http://ralfast.wordpress.com (link to post)
articshark – http://www.drslaten.com/blog (link to post) <————————–me
Lady Cat – http://randomwriterlythoughts.blogspot.ca (link to post)
U2Girl – http://ancatdubh.org (link to post)
MsLaylaCakes – http://www.taraquan.com/ (link to post)
SuzanneSeese – http://www.viewofsue.blogspot.com/ (link to post)
robynmackenzie – http://iwanttobeawesomewhenigrowup.com/ (link to post)
Sunwords – http://susannedoering.wordpress.com/ (link to post)
Angyl78 – http://jelyzabeth.wordpress.com/ (link to post)
susanielson – http://somesemblancethereof.blogspot.com/ (link to post)
HistorySleuth – http://historysleuth.blogspot.com (link to post)
SRHowen – http://srhowen1.blogspot.com/ (link to post)
Lyra Jean – http://beyondtourism.wordpress.com/ (link to post)
xcomplex – http://arielemerald.blogspot.com/ (link to post)
milkweed – http://www.thistlequill.blogspot.com/ (link to post)